Practical Uses
by xxmonochromekissxx
Summary: Levi hates his job as a teacher and he hates the stupid teenagers he has to teach. Erwin on the other hand is constantly trying to act cool to impress them. His latest attempt at being cool does not impress Levi...that is until Erwin shows him the practical uses for a tongue piercing.


Levi hated his job. It was something everyone could tell at first glance, and if anyone asked why he would always reply in the same way. _I hate the shitty little brats._

The "shitty little brats" he was talking about were not actually children, but college students in their late teens. But Levi hated them and everything they did. There were a few exceptions to the rule, such as Petra who was hardworking and actually showed him respect. But in general, he hated teenagers and had no interest in trying to connect with them.

Erwin on the other hand tried everything he could to impress them, no matter how often he failed. One of the most embarrassing attempts had been when he had dragged Levi with him to a nightclub he knew some of their students often went to. The evening started off badly since Erwin continuously referred to the club as a "disco", while Levi simply complained over and over that "every damn song sounds the same." Things only got worse when Erwin decided to rectify this by approaching the DJ and making a request.

"Excuse me...sorry to interrupt mid-song. But do you happen to have Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley?" Erwin asked as politely as possible over the sound of the music.

"Dude...are you high?" the DJ yelled back at him, rolling his eyes at the ridiculous question.

"Even I know that's not how clubs work, you fucking idiot." Levi huffed before grabbing Erwin by the arm and dragging him outside. After that night Erwin had given up going to clubs, but his pathetic attempts to be cool didn't stop.

Erwin's most recent attempts at trying to be cool involved using modern technology he knew nothing about. Levi was sick of seeing Erwin swiping at the new touchscreen phone struggling to even answer a call, and he was sick of the random slang words and abbreviations that now made his text messages indecipherable. But even more annoying was listening to Erwin's complaints as he tried and failed to use twitter.

"Not again. A hundred and forty characters isn't long enough." Erwin had sighed loudly one afternoon while Levi attempted to read a book nearby. "First I can't figure out the hashtags, now this."

"I have six characters for you. SHUT UP!" Levi snapped angrily, slamming his book down on the table.

"That's actually seven because there's a space. It would be eight if you add a full stop or exclamation mark." Erwin had replied, trying not to smirk at the furious glare Levi was giving him.

Today however had been a good day for Levi. Since he had a day off, he had spent most of the morning reading through one of his favourite novels. Erwin had decided to go out on his own instead of pestering him about social media, so he had been able to read without any interruptions. Naturally, his quiet time couldn't last forever and he soon heard Erwin making his way through the front door.

"Wow, today has been so lit. Guess who I bumped into?" Erwin called out, making Levi groan instantly. Calling anything and everything "lit" was another bad habit Erwin had developed.

"I don't know. Just tell me and save us some time." Levi sighed.

"I saw Eren and Armin." Erwin replied as he walked into the living room.

"And what did those shitty brats-" Levi started but the words soon died in his mouth when he looked up at Erwin. Instead of his normal white shirt and black trousers that Levi had seen him leave in, he now wore black jeans with several tears in the leg and a large silver chain hanging from the belt. He also wore a low cut black shirt that left most of his chest exposed, and his blonde hair was now dyed black. It was an odd look, and although Levi didn't mind the extra skin on display it looked out of place. Erwin was far too old to be dressing like a punk, not to mention his large bushy eyebrows were still blonde and now clashed with his jet black hair.

"Who the fuck has done this to you?!" Levi gasped when he finally recovered from his initial shock.

"Oh, this? I decided to try a punk look. It's in right now. Or so Eren tells me." Erwin replied with a casual shrug.

"Fucking Jeager and his stupid ideas. I knew one of the shitty brats would be behind this. You need to stop letting them influence you so much." Levi groaned, shaking his head in despair. He felt thankful that Erwin hadn't come back with any tattoos or piercings at least.

Erwin made his way over to the sofa and sat down beside Levi, the large chain on his belt making a soft jingling noise. "I thought you might like it. It's pretty lit."

Levi raised an eyebrow, noticing a sudden flash of silver as Erwin spoke. No piercings...or so he had thought. "You've got a bloody tongue piercing." he huffed, clearly unimpressed.

"Don't you like it? I thought you might find it sexy." Erwin smirked, sticking his tongue out so Levi could get a better view of his new piercing.

"No. It's unhygienic." Levi replied, shuffling a little further away from him. "I don't know why anyone would want one. It serves no practical purpose at all."

"Are you sure?" Erwin asked with a sly grin.

Before Levi had a chance to reply he suddenly found himself being forcefully pushed down onto the sofa, Erwin's large body towering over him. This wasn't exactly something new. Levi had experienced Erwin jumping him several times before when he'd been trying to work or read, but he was wondering what on earth was Erwin trying to prove.

"And this is supposed to change my mind how?" Levi breathed out as he stared up into Erwin's deep blue eyes. He only felt more frustrated when Erwin didn't reply but simply closed the gap between them, their lips mere inches apart. "Oi...what?" Levi murmured.

The only answer Levi received was a brief kiss on the lips followed by Erwin's tongue being forced into his mouth. He had more or less expected that, but still it didn't prove anything. The kiss was leaving him breathless and incredibly turned on, but although he didn't like to admit it Erwin's kisses always did. It had nothing to do with the small silver ball he could feel pressing against his tongue.

"You idiot…" Levi panted once Erwin broke the kiss, a small trail of saliva still connecting them. His face was now flushed a light shade of pink and a slight bulge straining against his pants.

"Don't pretend you didn't like it." Erwin replied.

"That still doesn't prove anything. Your kisses always make me feel that good." Levi huffed. His eye twitched in annoyance when Erwin smirked at that. "Oh, fuck off. Don't get all big headed." he groaned.

"I wasn't doing that to prove a point. That was just to get you hard." Erwin said with a sly grin, his hand slowly wandering down to between Levi's legs. "Now I'm going to prove my point."

"What the fuck does that mean?" Levi huffed, watching in anticipation as Erwin removed his belt and slid his pants down just far enough to free his erection. He wasn't at all surprised when Erwin dipped his head low. "You predictable shit." he mumbled.

Erwin let out a low chuckle before running his tongue along the underside of Levi's length, his piercing rolling along the sensitive skin. He couldn't have hoped for a better reaction than the loud mewling sound that escaped Levi's lips. The shorter man was completely losing his composure already.

"Aah! F-fine! Point made!" Levi gasped, gripping the soft fabric of the sofa beneath him. He had to admit the piercing did make things much more pleasurable than normal. And it seemed like Erwin had no intention of stopping either. Levi let out another long moan as Erwin slowly took his full length into his mouth, swirling his tongue along the shaft. "Stop! Ah, seriously...fuck, Erwin...you'll make a mess!"

Barely a few seconds later and Levi was coming hard into Erwin's mouth. Not that Erwin seemed to mind since he eagerly swallowed it all, a smug grin still plastered on his face. It had been probably the shortest and best blowjob of Levi's life, and for a moment he simply lay there panting heavily. "Idiot…" he huffed when he finally started to come down from his high.

"I didn't hear you complaining." Erwin replied teasingly.

"I was complaining!" Levi snapped, sitting up with a childish pout on his face. "You better clean this shit up." he demanded, struggling to pull his pants back up.

"So is this new look of mine lit then?" Erwin asked.

"No. You still look ridiculous. Get rid of that stupid outfit." Levi said in as cold a voice as he could manage. "Keep the piercing though." he mumbled quietly.

"Oh, I will." Erwin grinned.

Perhaps Levi was right about the punk look not suiting him, but he had found a new way to tease his boyfriend and he certainly wasn't giving that up.

 _## I was feeling incredibly lazy when I wrote this so probably not my best work but oh well. ##_


End file.
